Long Distance Relationship

                Heart problems seems to be one of the most bankable stories overseas. Blame it to long distance relationship. There is no single day that you won't hear any (exaggerated? ok make it weekly then). Sad thing is, it keeps repeating itself. Similar reasons, similar situations, similar events, similar scenarios and similar reactions. Not to mention almost similar approach...giving chances to the one who wronged them. For sure you will tell me chances are endless if you are in love but how many chances you should exhaust before you say it's over?

               As any different life changing events, we go through denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance (DABDA).

               Call it biased or feminism but this article is intended for women. i acknowledged that men goes through break-ups and grieving but I don't have enough data to speak for them. Besides, the reason I came up to this is because women tend to dwell on the denial stage for a very long time...a week maybe acceptable but months and years are different stories. The guy is already enjoying and you on the other hand is in the corner crying.No offense meant but you are blinded with your own tears. 

               I know I'm in no position to advise neither to talk about love but mind you, I have seen and heard a lot of people hurt by break-ups. For that, I want to share my ideas on WHEN TO DRAW THE LINE.

          1. Your instinct tells you so. Yeah, I know you're good in ignoring it. "I want to see it with my                    own two eyes....I want him to tell me personally...The girl is just a flirt...He cheated just once...blah blah blah. REASONS! Can't you see you're the one giving reasons for him!?

          2. Suddenly he gets busy.

          3. He is now keeping secrets from you. Remember the times when he informs you every move he makes? When you can still access his account? When he needs approval for a new friend? Now he has a new account and you're not on it.

          4. You texted a paragraph and he replied "k", "gtg", "gb", "lol"....no more details.

          5. Ignores you. Forgot important dates.

          6. I Love You is no longer the end of conversation.

          7. Out of the blue a friend asks you if you and him are ok. Believe me that friend knows something. Interrogate!

          8. He is doing things you hate him doing.

          9. Accusing you of having an affair. Unless you are?

          10. He is insinuating for break-ups. Have you heard of: "Give me some break. I just need a space. It's not you it's me. I want to find myself. If we are meant to be then love will find a way." enough with the drama.

               These are just few of the many signs or clues of a relationship falling apart. I know there's no such thing as a perfect relationship and you will even tell me, "it make us stronger." Okay, fine! Work it out. But always remember, once is enough, two is too much and three is a poison. Don't waste your time with the wrong person 'cause you're giving chance to the right person to go with the wrong person also.

               Learn how to let go or would I say walk away 'cause the other person has let go of you already. Move on.

I'll be with you....

May first when I first dreamt of you

Since then I can't stop thinking of you

Suddenly I was captivated by you

Hoping that one day I'll be with you.

But at the depths of my soul I'm asking God

Why oh why Lord? This is so sudden...

Without seeing each other for fourteen years

Now, is this really happening to me?

I didn't imagine that this day will come

Day that my heart to beat so fast again

Whenever I see you in my screen

I can't help but smile and say a little prayer.

Yes, we oceans and mountains apart.

But you already catch my heart.

Is it possible that we'll see face to face one day?

That, I surrender it all to God who is in control.

Yes! I do believe in miracles

I believe that on that special day

We will see each other

God is working out and I'm so excited!

Higher are His ways than our ways

I know God is working in my heart and same as yours

Everything will be beautiful in His time

And when that perfect day comes I'll be saying to you...

Yes! I'm here and be with you for the rest of my life.

(This poem is an original composition of my friend Rhena)

For you Father

Growing old, all I think is thyself

Unintentionally put you in a shelf

Made only "I" as my world

I forgot you're also growing old

As I look at you today with keen

Your facade can't disguise this life has been

Every line of your wrinkles seems to have story

Some to me is not a secret or mystery

For all the heartaches and fears I've witnessed

For a while it made your world ceased

Perhaps you thought I don't care

But loosing you is my fear

Without you I would not be this tough

Proud to say not from your callused hands

Instead toughened by values you've shared

Even the strongest man can't steal

 You don't need to be affectionate nor say 

To prove that you care and love me

Cause I know you're a man of few words

Your actions and unspoken words had said it all

By ranking you're not number one

For you are the only man

Grateful to be the daughter

Of a typical doting father

 Annoyed by the alarms today in the hospital 'cause nobody's attending when an idea pop into my mind:

ALARMS are irritating but they were designed to remind us that something's wrong

 with the parameters we've set. Just like GOSSIPERS...so don't ignore them.

Lesson: People don't simply talk behind your back. Try to assess yourself 'cause they might be talking       

             about you for a reason. Learn from it but don't dwell on it...

          Leaving home is one of the major steps that anyone could do. Some leave for their education, some for work, some for marriage, some for independence and some just to distance themselves from pressure at home.

          Personally, I left home for work. At first I was excited and pre-occupied on many things that I want to do independently. Actually, leaving home for me was an achievement. That was the time when I was trying myself that I'm adventurous, that I love challenge and above all, that I'm a strong person. For sure I'm a strong person (still convincing myself). ;) Until reality sets in.

          Airport. After my uncle drop me off, every inch of my body fluttered but since I'm a strong person, I composed myself and go with the flow. Passed by the scanner and queued to check-in my 10kgs overweight luggage (I guess the crew noticed how anxious I am so he just accepted it). I guess that was it when the guard lead me to a longer queue. Thirty minutes later, I was face to face with the immigration officer. Handed her my passport and OEC (Overseas Employment Certificate), asked me Php750. She was about to return my documents when another noticed something and whispered to her. To may aghast, with strong resentment she gave back my money then told me, "Hindi ka ba nagbabasa? Do'n ang pila ng mga OFW"! (Weren't you reading? Line for OFW is on that side)! Oooppps, sorry was I able to say. While on the right line I saw a post saying something like: passengers should not malign nor insult immigration officers 'cause it's punishable by the law. How about vice versa? I've witnessed a lot worser scenario.

          Moving on. Airplane. Surrounded by strangers almost choked me. All I have to do then was to sleep, eat and sleep again for 9 long hours. Oh, I failed to mention our 1 hour stop over in Hongkong (one of the strictest airport I've been with). Technically, nothing happened.

          King Khalid International Airport, Riyadh KSA. Anxiety attacks. Believe me I'm not a super duper religious person however I managed to call every saints I've known. If you only know all the negative things I've heard regarding Saudi then you would understand (I'll tackle this on my next blogs). It wasn't bad after all.

          I managed to attend the general orientation the next day, introduced to my unit after a week, survived my 3 months probation and now, almost on my 3 years.

          To be continued...

Disoriented Me

It's not the supper, it's not the "night care" nor the prayer. If there's something I missed last night was to prepare myself for today's activities. As a result:

            1. I woke up at 0530, was supposed to iron my uniform when I realized I'm off
                duty.

            2. At 1130 still in lethargy, arose by a cry of a cat sounding like a baby (scary).

            3. Went directly to the kitchen to prepare my "brunch".

            4. Went back to my bedroom 'cause I forgot to do my morning care.

            5. Back to the kitchen to found out the kettle is burning 'cause it's out of water.

            6. 1220 my viand is ready but the rice pot is empty.

            7. Went outside to shrug off the jinx in me when I saw this still running: 

            

               I guess it's not only me who is disoriented today...might as well the gardener.

             8. Prepared myself to bake muffins when I found out I run out of baking cups.

             9. I forgot to drink my coffee :(

Amazingly I didn't forget to watch Eat Bulaga! In a way it brought me back to my function.

Anyway, whichever side of the bed you woke up always find something to get you back in track for everyday is a beautiful thing that God made for us to cherish. Have a great day!